jchu0ng:

chevy-raised-jack-daniels-fed:

merrymaudlin:

mercurykiss:

thugburrito:

My faith in pizza guys has gone up 123%

NO LET ME TELL YOU A STORYSo a few weeks ago I was in a hotel in Savannah with my grampa in the hospital next door, Mom was over staying with him, and the battery in the smoke detector went out so every 5 minutes it would let off this loud, high pitched ‘CHIRP’.It was annoying as fuck, so I called the front desk to see if they had a battery for it, and they said the only thing they could do was change rooms. We’d already settled in for the night, and needed the next door rooms for my uncles the next day, so I said I’d deal. My uncles had my car in the next town over, so I couldn’t drive and get one myself.An hour later, I’m ordering pizza and have gone insane because the damn thing CHIRPS. SO. MUCH.So I begged the pizza guy on the phone to stop and get me a battery, told him I’d pay for the battery, and give him an extra tip for it, and he was chill with it. This adorable fucker gets to my room with the battery, opens it, asks to see the smoke detector, CLIMBS ON THE BED, CHANGES THE BATTERY FOR ME, and tests it.My pizza was only 20 dollars, but I gave him 40 and told him to keep the change.

I am clearly not fully utilizing my pizza delivery person…..

What’s next pizza delivery hitmen

omg “pizza delivery hitmen” LOLOL

jchu0ng:

chevy-raised-jack-daniels-fed:

merrymaudlin:

mercurykiss:

thugburrito:

My faith in pizza guys has gone up 123%

NO LET ME TELL YOU A STORY
So a few weeks ago I was in a hotel in Savannah with my grampa in the hospital next door, Mom was over staying with him, and the battery in the smoke detector went out so every 5 minutes it would let off this loud, high pitched ‘CHIRP’.

It was annoying as fuck, so I called the front desk to see if they had a battery for it, and they said the only thing they could do was change rooms. We’d already settled in for the night, and needed the next door rooms for my uncles the next day, so I said I’d deal. My uncles had my car in the next town over, so I couldn’t drive and get one myself.

An hour later, I’m ordering pizza and have gone insane because the damn thing CHIRPS. SO. MUCH.

So I begged the pizza guy on the phone to stop and get me a battery, told him I’d pay for the battery, and give him an extra tip for it, and he was chill with it. This adorable fucker gets to my room with the battery, opens it, asks to see the smoke detector, CLIMBS ON THE BED, CHANGES THE BATTERY FOR ME, and tests it.

My pizza was only 20 dollars, but I gave him 40 and told him to keep the change.

I am clearly not fully utilizing my pizza delivery person…..

What’s next pizza delivery hitmen

omg “pizza delivery hitmen” LOLOL

darkesthorizons:

neptuneisforlovers:

ITS NOT SEWING SUPPLIES!

My question is how does every single person identify with this, is it like a secret rule to use those for sewing supplies?

darkesthorizons:

neptuneisforlovers:

ITS NOT SEWING SUPPLIES!

My question is how does every single person identify with this, is it like a secret rule to use those for sewing supplies?

an-angel-fighting-nightmares:

shavostars:

mrsmiawallaces:

This Vine gives me life

I’m reblogging this again, because this gives me life and a will to live even in the darkest hours.

I WATCHED THIS WITH THE VOLUME ALL THE WAY UP AND MY DAD RIGHT NEXT TO ME!


Eye Button Artwork by Elodie Antoine

Eye Button Artwork by Elodie Antoine

littlemammal:

gorillamunchies:

hootaloo:

hootaloo:

bowrll:

mortisreptus:

fireskink:

alltailnolegs:

mcsprankles:

idcsam:

shadow-pop:

whatisagorman:

snakelet:

this is 911 state your emergency


YES I NEED HELP IMMEDIATELY I CAN’T FIND MY LIZARD


911 I THINK MY LIZARD IS BROKEN


YOU THINK YOU’VE GOT PROBLEMS? MY PHONE SEEMS TO HAVE LOST IT’S LEGS


911 I CAN’T GET MY PHONE OFF THE RECEIVER


MA’AM YOUR PHONE NEEDS TO BE IN THE UNLOCKED POSITION AND MAY NEED TO BE PROVIDED WITH ADDITIONAL HARDWARE TO FUNCTION CORRECTLY.


YES HELLO 911 CAN YOU HEAR ME I DROPPED MY HEADSET IN THE WATER DO YOU READ


TO BE HONEST 911, I AM NOT SURE WHAT MY PHONE IS DOING

911 MY PHONE IS FACING THE WRONG WAY AND I CAN’T GET IT TO TURN AROUND.


yes 911 hello all these people are crazy

this is still going around and it makes me rly happy.

littlemammal
I spy baby gorman

this was my big breakout post. this was my Creep, my Wonderwall, my Oops I Did It Again

littlemammal:

gorillamunchies:

hootaloo:

hootaloo:

bowrll:

mortisreptus:

fireskink:

alltailnolegs:

mcsprankles:

idcsam:

shadow-pop:

whatisagorman:

snakelet:

this is 911 state your emergency

image

YES I NEED HELP IMMEDIATELY I CAN’T FIND MY LIZARD

image

911 I THINK MY LIZARD IS BROKEN

image

YOU THINK YOU’VE GOT PROBLEMS? MY PHONE SEEMS TO HAVE LOST IT’S LEGS

image

911 I CAN’T GET MY PHONE OFF THE RECEIVER

image

MA’AM YOUR PHONE NEEDS TO BE IN THE UNLOCKED POSITION AND MAY NEED TO BE PROVIDED WITH ADDITIONAL HARDWARE TO FUNCTION CORRECTLY.

image

YES HELLO 911 CAN YOU HEAR ME I DROPPED MY HEADSET IN THE WATER DO YOU READ

image

TO BE HONEST 911, I AM NOT SURE WHAT MY PHONE IS DOING

image
911 MY PHONE IS FACING THE WRONG WAY AND I CAN’T GET IT TO TURN AROUND.

image

yes 911 hello all these people are crazy

this is still going around and it makes me rly happy.

littlemammal
I spy baby gorman

this was my big breakout post. this was my Creep, my Wonderwall, my Oops I Did It Again

Fleurdulys :

Portrait of a Girl in Russian Costume - Marianne von Werefkin
1888

Fleurdulys :

Portrait of a Girl in Russian Costume - Marianne von Werefkin

1888

Once I was beautiful. Now I am myself.
Anne Sexton, “You, Doctor Martin,” from The Complete Poems (via mirroir)

bestieswithbreasties:

1. I can borrow all your clothes.

Anything in your closet, no matter how fancy is co-owned by me, your best friend. I can borrow it for as long as I want. One stipulation to my borrowing your clothes is that you have to have worn the item at least once before I borrow…

This is the best I want a friend like this.

n0hemian:

saepphire:

❁

☀️

n0hemian:

saepphire:

☀️

月に代わっておしおきよ
Tsukini Kawatte, Oshioki yo!

kaiju-koi:

Dudes on OKC:
-*think women need to shave*
*against abortion*
*men should be heads of households*
*anti-gay*
*women owe them sex*
*but shouldn’t be “sluts”*
*0% compatibility* 

"LOL hey cutie what’s up?"

GROSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS